Don't Just Do Something, Sit There

New Milk Moon

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It is that darkest of dark time of the year when we review the year that just passed and begin to prepare for the one coming up. For the last three years I have done this in a more formal way and rather than making new years resolutions, I have gwished a theme for the upcoming year. As 2013 comes to a close the need for review of the old and gestation of the new is here again.

Part of a Tribe in the Spring

2013 was one hell of a year. The theme I set last January was Naming My Superpowers, Calling My Allies and it came with a wish and a hope to put my talents to good use and to build my community of allies to help with that work. I was looking for more discernment in my activities and my companions. I think I did a better job in 2013 than in previous years, but my skills of discernment clearly need more honing.

I didn't do as much blogging this year as in the past but going back through my Facebook feed allowed me to review the year in pretty good detail. Last winter and spring were amazing times of growth and exploration. I fell in love with an amazing man and we had some wonderful adventures together. Food, sex, conversations; it was mind and life expanding. My one blog post from this spring dates from this period and sums up a lot of my thinking during this time. And then my life exploded. That relationship fell apart and then I got very ill with a bacterial infection that took all the king's horses and all the king's men to put me back together again. The physical toll was great and the emotional toll was possibly greater. Emotions I didn't know I had overwhelmed me so I did what I am in the habit of doing.... more stuff. The late summer found me in another intense romantic relationship and then in an amazingly intense job. I got the middle school science teaching position I've been angling for for years and it is everything and more. This autumn has felt like a crisis time when everything is falling apart. My summer motto of 'better but not yet betterer' took on whole new levels of emotional and existential meaning. I wrote about my thinking along these lines in this post from late November. Apparently, it is 

Dolled Up Mid-Summer

difficult for my seventh grade students to be 12, but almost just as difficult for me to be thirty three.

Even with the major hiccup in the summer of being, ya know, almost dead for close to a month, I still followed my standard M.O. of going full speed ahead in 2013. I may have still had difficulty knowing what to say no to, but I had allies all along the way. My friends were amazing during my illness and recovery and I learned so much from the men I met and loved this year. Building community, or at least thinking about how to do it, was a major theme of this year. In my 2013 gwish post I used a photo with the african proverb, "if you want to go fast, go alone, if you want to go far, go together." I don't know how far I got, but I know I got there because of my friends this year.

During this time of gestating my intentions for 2014 I have employed many of my traditional gwishing techniques. I drew a tarot spread, listened for resonance with colors, images, animals and phrases. I thought about what I wanted and what I did not want from this upcoming year and finally, after weeks of thinking and listening, found my theme for the year.

2014, Don't Just Do Something, Sit There.

By Sharon Flowers

The phrase is a title of a book by Sylvia Boorstein, a Buddhist teacher I first heard through Krista Tippet's amazing interview with her. It is a joke, a play on words, a phrase that always makes me chuckle and smile wryly. You're right, you're right, I know you're right I mutter as the phrase pops into my head. In the last few years I have cultivated my doing self and have learned so much from that, but as I continued doing and did not feel any better about my life it became more frantic and obsessive. In a particularly dark moment of this last autumn I was on a date with a gentleman caller, drinking beer, talking about politics, looking forward to our adult sleepover, when my internal commentator noted, "Dang, girlfriend, you got this doing-and-not-feeling thing down to a science!" That frantic doing has metastasized into uncontrollable worry and anxiety this winter and I feel miserable much of the time. And it is all so boring. It is the same stupid patterns I've had for years but now that I see them they are achey and dull, not even succeeding at what they were designed to do.

I did draw a tarot spread this winter (and will talk more about it below) but this year my theme came a lot from listening for resonance with words and images. The blue heron, a patient and stealthy hunter, will be my theme animal for this 

By David Jakes

year. Herons sit still as a tree waiting for their prey to forget they're there. They work hard to not spook off the good stuff that will surely come their way. Like herons, chicory flowers have been making themselves known to me for years. They are the weediest of the weedy plants and will grow out of sidwalks, along highways, in gravel drives and on the edges of lawns. It is used for salad greens, livestock forage, a coffee subsitute and a medicine for all sorts of ailments. The gorgeous blue flowers are said to be able to open locked doors. Powerful allies to have in this year of bravely facing the habits of mind and heart that rear their head in physical and mental stillness.

Other symbols of stillness and introspection have come to work with me. The first was an unlikely and ancient copper Buddha found in Helgo, a Viking town dating to about 800 C.E. The small, beautifully worked statue appears to have been made about two to three hundred years earlier in northern India and then worked its way through trade and capture this important center of Viking trade. 1500 years after it was made and thousands of miles away, the Buddha continues to be a visual representation of the ability of humans to achieve some kind of peace. This Buddha is a conundrum,

The Helgo Buddha

 though, because this statue has traveled so far away from where it started. Like the heron who can spread its 7 foot wing span to find a better pond or stream and the weedy chicory that has hitched rides with humans to all ends of the earth, the Helgo Buddha has traveled but not lost it's stillness. My tarot card for the year is the Hermit, another character travels with stillness. This Hermit card came at the end of a spread full of winged hearts, this is the cups suit in my Fairy Tale Tarot deck. This suit is correlated with emotions, dreams and the moon and the winged heart itself is a Sufi symbol for unconditional love and devotion. My spread indicated that work must be done finding or giving support and unity in this realm before connection and healing can happen. Then those powers of love can be used to help others, fight for what is right and increase the true wealth of love in this world.

• 2014 will be green like old copper and healthy trees, grey like heron feathers, carved stones and a hermit-wizard's cloak, blue like summer skies and weedy chicory flowers. 
• 2014 will be a year of answering the phone with "What fresh hell is this?" and hoping it really is a new problem rather than the reheated boring problems I have seen before.
• 2014 will be a year of knowing what to keep and what to let go. It will be a year of cultivating Right Memory (seeing the patterns but facing the world fresh), of Right Heart (Finding new ways of love while releasing obsessive and painful habits) and Right Attention (now that I don't have to be perfect, I can be good). 
• 2014 will be a year of attending to my people, building patterns of connection and of swirling round and round with others who want to dance. It will be a time of building the world I want; don't just sit there, do something.

This last gwish is based on my Sabian symbol for 2014, Gemini 22: Dancing Couples Crowd the Barn in a Harvest Festival. The first part of my theme for this year is all about finding peace and joy in stillness, introspection and changing my own patterns of thought and feeling about the world. This symbol and gwish provide the other side of this coin, that of cultivating peace and joy through healthy connection with other people. My best friends and I are working out plans for a game night of sorts, an attempt to build our friend community back up into fruitful health, a project streaming directly out of my work at calling my allies last year. The allies have been called, now they need to connect with each other into a true caring community. This symbol brings to mind ceremonial times out of the daily grind of work to connect, enjoy and celebrate the turning of the seasons. In addition to our game night, I think this image is calling me to 

New Years Day 2014

find ways to connect in my church and school communities as well as rekindle my connection to the wheel of the year through blogging and celebrations. 

Many of my friends found 2013 to be an exceptionally challenging year. Some have much more painful horror stories from this year than I do but my year was hard. I was sick, I was heartbroken and I struggled a lot with uncovering truths about who I am and how I operate. I did have moments of pure bliss, wild adventures and times of deep connection. 2014 will be a year of more discernment, more stillness, more interesting problems and more dancing joyfully in the stream of the cosmos. I for one am looking forward to it. 

* Full text of Gemini 22: DANCING COUPLES CROWD THE BARN IN A HARVEST FESTIVAL

When achievements have been made and there is a sense of security and 'Harvest' in the air, it is time to celebrate with one another. There is a need to get back to a simple, conservative level of enjoyment. There's a sense of being in tune with seasonal rhythms. The feeling of a healthy heart and a healthy mind, while taking a break from the struggles of providing, can bring joy to everyone involved. See if you can take time out to celebrate and to enjoy your environment.

Celebrating the warmth and providence of the Earth. The joy of nature's harvest. Joining with others to celebrate. The reality of rhythmical or seasonal adjustments. Dancing. Barns and dance halls.

The Caution: Being the wallflower, not participating. Waiting for a special invitation rather than responding to the openness of the situation.

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New Milk Moon 2009: New Milk Moon

New Milk Moon 2010: Forty Two with a Seventy Percent Chance of Rain

New Milk Moon 2011: The Quaker Year

New Milk Moon 2012: Year of the Dragon

This post is a New Year's Gwishing post. Be sure to check out previous year's posts: 2011 Building a Better Teacher, 2012 Grabbing the Tiger By the Tail and 2013 Engaging My Superpowers, Calling My Allies. There are older and other New Years day posts under the label New Year.

Happy Hours and Pirate Queens

The Full Mating Moon

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The Mating Moon is here! The spring of the year is in full swing and every living thing out there is rocking and rolling, making the most of the longer days and fairer weather.

Danny Perez Photography

In Annette Hinshaw's calendar, the Mating Moon reminds us not just of physical mating, the coming together of two bodies to create a new life, but the intellectual bringing together of ideas that is so essentially human. This spring I have been so very busy, but out of that activity has come a flowering of realizations about my life, physical, emotional and spiritual. The Mating Moon is doing it's work!

As this crazy month has rolled through I have been doing something I've never done before - dating. I have been active on an online site popular here in Portland have met a bunch of people for drinks, meals, conversations and whatever else might come up. What a strange ritual we go through in this culture! I have stories of boring dates and brilliant dates, but among all of that I have been able to do so much thinking about myself through my conversations with these other people. Every time I meet someone new I have to retell my own story and get to hear their story and that exchange is amazingly fruitful. It has been fun to come away from each new encounter with a new person knowing something a little more about myself, what I like, what I know, what I am good at and bad at. I know more about myself, my life and my world because I have been rubbing up against others who know different things, and that is the main point the Mating Moon is trying to make.

Danny Perez Photography

It's been an interesting ride this last month, being pulled into a very physical and emotional state rather than the intellectual and spiritually focused state I feel I've been in for the last few months or even years. I have had some interesting epiphanies and realizations, mostly along the lines of encouraging me to keep going and exploring. One morning I woke up seeing a giant, flashing neon sign in my minds eye saying YES. Yes, what? I sensibly asked. My response was simply more yes. I laughed and said, sure, whatever. Yes! Bring it on, bring it all in and on and on! Shortly after that, though, I was faced with one of the perils of "mating", or of bringing Other into Self; the risk that you might lose track of who Self is. As I wrestled with this, Havi Brook's image of sovereignty, the Pirate Queen, came to me. It was such a pleasure to see her and be reminded that though I can reach out and say yes to every thing that comes my way, I am expected to stay strong and centered in my own awesomeness, too. A Pirate Queen is not going to send an "I miss you" text at midnight on a Tuesday, is she now? :)

Lilacs and tulips, horse chestnuts, snails, salamanders and bumble bees. The whole world is out and buzzing around. Saying yes and enjoying what this glorious spring time world has to offer. And I'm right there with them.

How are you feeling the energies of the Mating Moon? Did you get out to see the Super Moon or have you been observing more terrestrial miracles like blooming flowers and leafing trees? What encounters with Other are making you smarter, happier and wiser?

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Full Mating Moon 2011: The Green Month

Full Mating Moon 2010: Mercurial

Full Mating Moon 2009: The Flower Moon

Grabbing the Tiger by the Tail

Full Birth Moon

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Welcome to the first full moon of 2012, the Birth Moon. Happy New Year! Did you have a wonderful holiday weekend, full of friends, parties and maybe a few more thoughtful moments? Have you been savoring the darkness of this time of year, incubating plans for the coming season of light? Or have you been trying to drown out the dark with lights and liquor, food, parties and go go go, fun fun fun? Yeah, I've been doing some of both, too.

Last year at about this time, I looked over the year before, did some gwishing and came up with a theme for 2011: Building a Better Teacher. As I look back on this last year I see how that theme really filled out the year. I really enjoyed my coursework, did a lot of processing with the deeper themes of equity, child development and how our public schools work, and actually spent some time in a public school classroom. I

Winter Sky

feel like so much of the rest of what I did this year helped me build a better teacher, too. The play and poetry I engaged in during the spring and summer, my trip to visit my family in Southern California, working through all the hard stuff and then more hard stuff and every bit of reading and writing I did this year all helped me become a stronger, clearer person and more ready to be a friend, mentor and leader to teenagers. 

The days between Christmas and Epiphany are considered the 12 Days of Christmas and there are many esoteric beliefs and traditions associated with these dark nights. Some people believe that the weather of the twelve days associates with the weather of the corresponding months in the upcoming year, and others use that correspondence to do meditation or planning for those months. Other people use the 12 nights to focus on the upcoming year in a more general way, on their own spirituality or on inner work they might want to work on in the coming year. No matter what, it is a time of sinking into the deep dark, bringing the magic of the Christmas rebirth into the new year and getting ready for the Epiphany, the lighting up and insight, that can come if you are ready for it. I spent some of the 12 days, and some before and after, pondering about this upcoming year, 2012.

As I worked through what I want 2012 to look like and listened intently to what the Universe was hinting at, I used some old techniques and some new. I read my Fairy Tale Tarot deck and looked at Sabian Symbols. I prayed in Meeting and in my car. I listened to the conversations I had with my friends and examined what stories were really speaking to me during this time. I brainstormed qualities and imagined scenes from the year. It took a lot of pondering and meditating and thinking, but finally… I am ready to unveil 2012.

Grabbing the Tiger By the Tail

• 2012 will be a year of saying yes to adventure, of facing the fearsome, of just doing it, no matter what "it" is.
• 2012 will look ballsy and awesome, effortless and amazing! Sometimes it will look as challenging as it feels, but it will always look real. 
• 2012 will feel exciting and terrifying, hard but do-able, good like a hard work out or a tricky puzzle. 
• 2012 will be bright orange and zebra striped. It will smell like cinnamon and snow. It will sound like big bells, the crack of a bat and the roar of a crowd, it will sound like the Rocky Theme song (being played by a Hawaiian marching band... which will follow me everywhere this year. Get ready).

2012 is going to be full of adventures. I am student teaching at a middle school, looking for a job in the spring and summer and good Lord willin’ start as a classroom teacher in the fall. I might have to move and will definitely be meeting new people all along the way. I have no idea what adventures this 

The Tiger's Stripes

summer holds for me, in fact, I don’t even know where June rent is coming from. I am going to need to step up to the plate this year and grab each tiger by the tail as it comes my way or I might miss an opportunity, either material or otherwise as they zoom by.

There are other kinds of tigers lurking in 2012, though, too. The story that I shared with you earlier in the month is a story about a man who runs from a tiger that is more about emotions than about the material world. Stefano is terrified of the columber and spends his whole life running, ending up a sad and lonely man. Almost immediately after my motto for the year came to me I had a situation where I realized that I was running from a columber. Something was scary to admit, hard to feel and I ran away from it through blame and anger. As hard as Grabbing the Tiger of jobs and teaching By the Tail might be, turning to Face the Columber is even harder.

Over the last year I’ve been thinking a lot about courage. Courage is not necessarily not feeling afraid of what you are facing, but it is working through that fear and doing something anyway. The last time I really examined courage, I realized that it is the root of all other virtues. To be generous, or loving, or loyal, kind or grateful all require facing fear of being laughed at, or rejected or judged and acting anyway. This year, I will need to draw on all of my courage to Grab the Tiger and Face the 

By Don Kenn

Columber. The Mission Statement I wrote a couple years ago declares that I am an ambassador of the Universal Divine and ambassadors are always under the protection of those who send them. I have the full backing of god in my work, and I have nothing to fear. 

“My life, glowing with integrity, shines a bright light out into the world. I am filled with the light of god and others around me see it and respond.”

What does 2012 have in store for you? Did you do some gwishing or dream decreeing during the 12 days of Christmas or at some other time this winter? What is your motto for the upcoming year, what is your year going to look like or smell like? Do you have a story about gathering your courage and Grabbing a Tiger by the Tail or Facing a Columber? Happy New Year!

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** This winter was tough and I got messed up in my calendar. I wrote this thinking it was the Milk Moon but it was really the Birth Moon. Since the post itself is more about the the new year of 2012, I just changed the tags and labels. For more on my thoughts about this, see this post. **

Full Birth Moon 2008: Outer Darkness and Inner Hope

Full Birth Moon 2009: New Year! and A Story for the Birth Moon 

Full Birth Moon 2010: The Dark of the Dark.

Full Birth Moon 2011: The Columber

Some Birth Moon posts are dated for a Gregorian year but are a part of a lunar year that mostly takes place in the Gregorian year before. Confusing.

This post is about new years, a topic I discussed in the posts The Quaker Year, New Year and New Milk Moon.

The New Birth Moon

New Birth Moon

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Lest that last post leave you worried that I am drowning in depressing and darkness....

The veil has lifted. The Birth Moon is risen!


I can't tell what made the change. I finished a big writing portion of my student last week and am actually teaching now. Maybe I finally was able to hang onto the positive attitude breakthrough I've been bobbing in and out of for a few weeks. Maybe it was God showing me, through a question asked at Meeting last weekend of what would heaven look like, that really cemented the change of heart. My response was that heaven looks just like this life, only I get the unshakable, undeniable knowledge that everything that happens is part of the Divine System and really will make everyone stronger, smarter, wiser and happier. It felt like as soon as I wrote those words down the scales fell from my eyes and I really did see heaven here and now.

Yes, I'm still tired. Yes, there is tons of work and stress. But I do really, honestly feel... really know in my heart... that it is all just the work that has been set up, uniquely and purposefully, for me.

Have you ever felt this realization? How have you worked through hard periods in your life? What sooths you in times of stress the way the sight of the new crescent moon soothed me this week?

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** This winter was tough and I got messed up in my calendar. The moon that this post was written about -the Birth Moon - and the moon that it actually was according to Annette Hinshaw's calendar - the Death Moon - are not the same. For more on my thoughts about this, see this post. ** 

New Birth Moon 2008: Waiting

New Birth Moon 2009: Advent, Awaiting the Birth

New Birth Moon 2010: Winter is Dark, Yet Each Tiny Spark

New Birth Moon 2011: It's Hard

I also talked about Very Hard Things in the post Very Bad Things and Our Lady of Sorrows.

I Didn't See Fairies When I was Little

More on May Day

May Day 2009: May Day
May Day 2010: Glory Days
May Day 2011: The Brook in the King's Garden

P.S. My last post, The Brook in the King's Garden was my 100th post! That's a lot of writing on my part and a lot of reading on your part. Go us!

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I didn't see fairies when I was little, I had to learn to see them after I was grown. As a child I played in redwood groves and mudflats, feeling the pulsing life in the land. I pretended to be raccoons, pioneers and alligators in oak groves, meadows and creeks, as close to the grass and sky as snakes and gulls. I didn't need fairies to know the living presences of the earth.

There comes a time, though, when we separate from that wholeness. We fall, we wake up, we walk through a doorway we didn't even know was there. We become aware of our Self and our Self's desires, needs and fears. I still walked in dark forests and open fields but I was thinking about little sisters, algebra and boys. I saw the flowers and clouds, but I didn't SEE them any longer.

My path back to seeing fairies started with my intellect. Those early experiences in the woods and fields had laid a foundation for an interest in natural science that I pursued through high school and college. I remember coming home from 11th grade biology class, going to my favorite wooded canyon and experiencing deep awe over the xylem and phloem system in an fir tree - it was transporting gallons of water, dozens of feet with nothing more than water tension, evaporation and magic. I laid down on the forest floor and looked up at those trees, the wonderment of nature washing over me like a wave. I didn't see fairies that day, but I was beginning to feel them again.

These days I do see fairies, sprites, gnomes and even sometimes angels. They are a form of the divine spirit, personification of the subtle life force in all natural and living elements. Flower fairies, water sprites, pixies of the woods, these are to me projections of the divine spirit in the way our own human souls are. I have actually learned to perceive these elementals. My scientific mind was an early gateway to recognizing the Ultimate Mystery, but I have found other gateways show themselves when the intellect is suspended, or balanced with other forms of perceiving and thinking. A childlike, beginners mind and a rich diet of beautiful stories have opened my heart and my eyes to the dancing forms of the divine all around me.

When have you seen fairies? When have you been so in tune with the subtle forces of nature that you don't need to see them? How are you celebrating the blossoming of the year this spring?

The Quaker Year

New Milk Moon

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Happy New Year! It’s 2011! I hope everyone had a lovely New Years Eve and has been enjoying what this new year is bringing your way. I went out with some friends to a dance party and had a lovely time. I don’t make new years resolutions, but I do make goals and one for 2011 is to be very aware of my alcohol consumption. I enjoy letting loose and being a part of the party I am ready to stop getting “accidentally intoxicated” and also sick of wasting my time being hung over. I only had one glass of champagne on New Years and it has been so encouraging to know that I can go out, have fun with my friends, be silly and goofy and still get home safely and at a reasonable time, and be fully functional the next day. Happy 2011 indeed!

Last year at New Year’s I pondered the idea of naming years like we name months in this calendar. One group that gave a “name” to their years are the American Indian people of the northern Great Plains. The Sioux and other Northern Plains tribes used a system called Winter Counts where a pictograph was chosen for each year recorded on a hide or piece of fabric. The pictographs, which spurred the memory of the storyteller who kept the count, often represented diseases, successful or tragic raids or wars, or natural events. The earliest Winter Count in the Smithsonian museum is called the Battiste Good winter count after the Lakota man who kept it in the late 1800s. On that Winter Count the year 1708 is called Many Kettle Winter after the tribe’s first interaction with the English that resulted in them aquiring both guns and iron cooking kettles. The year 1751 was called Killed Two White Buffalo Cows year, after the very rare and auspicious event of getting two albino bison in the same winter.

I love the idea of naminga year so put some thought into the important events of these last 12 months in my life. I traveled to Pennsylvania in the summer and in the autumn my sister moved back home. I did a lot of creative writing over the course of the year, enjoyed the second year of my garden and Lucky died in October. But none of these things match my involvement at West Hills Friends church for being pivotal and influential on my life. I started attending this Quaker church in December of 2009 and went almost every weekend over the whole year. I started a practice of daily praying during Lent and have done a fair amount of bible reading as well as some serious study of Quaker testimonies and history. I made real and meaningful connections with other people in the community and even have the start of a few good friendships. In December I had the thought that I might be willing to say “I am a Quaker” rather than just that I attend a Quaker church. 2010 has clearly been The Quaker Year.

Both the Lakota people and myself in thinking about 2010 name the year as it is closing out but I would like to think about naming the year as it begins. Rather than just review and reflection that requires some divination. Ketzirah over at Peeling a Pomegranate did some wish dreaming (gwishing as Havi at The Fluent Self might call it) for her 2010 and came up with a theme and some affirmations she calls her Dream Decree. I looked for inspiration for my own wish dreaming for this upcoming year in the mysterious Sabian Symbols, a set of images and descriptions for each of the 360 degrees in the astrological zodiac. The symbols were clairvoyantly “discovered” by an astrologer and a spiritualist medium in 1925 but like other complex oracles tap into a very deep understanding of the world. Using Lynda Hill’s online oracle I randomly picked two symbols for my year 2011.

The first symbol I chose is Cancer 23: This Symbol shows the gathering together of those of like mind in order to exchange or share ideas and information. My secondary symbol is Aquarius 3, “A deserter from the navy stands suddenly aware of a dawning truth: Freedom is never the result of compromise.”

The first seems a perfect, almost too easy fit for what I see of 2011 so far. I just started a Masters of Arts in Teaching program with the goal of becoming a public school teacher. The program uses a cohort model of a strong small group that studies together throughout the 16 month program and has the overall program objectives of getting teachers to “Think critically, transform practice and promote justice.” Uh, yeah. That fits.

The second symbol at first glance seems a warning about the constriction of rules and how they may come into conflict with strongly held beliefs and necessary freedoms. It seems to speak to the path I am taking towards a very regulated profession that requires personal passion and creativity, and the reservations and conflicts I feel about that. I also see a warning to be careful what I do, or fail to, engage in. It is asking me to practice my will force, not just the heart and mind forces alluded to in the first symbol, in whatever I choose to be a part of this year.

With these rich images, as well of those of Rob Breszny and his Free Will Astrology horoscope to guide me I have come up with my dream decree for 2011:

The only thing standing between this moment and the life I dream of is my own work in rooting out and collecting that which has been provided for me. My participation is required and what I create in collaboration with other seekers moves the world forward.

• I will be the Deputy Director of Green Lights and Purple Hearts. I will be courageous and diligent the exercise of my will.
• I will be the Puzzle Master Supreme and Minister of Marvelous Mysteries. I will be restless and selfless in the pursuit of meaning.
• I will be the Field Commander of Free Lunches and Poetic License. I will be loving in the cultivation and expression of my feeling life.

2010 was the year of Beautiful Quaker Mysteries. 2011 will be the year of Building The Future Teacher. What are you gwishing for 2011?

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Full text of the sabian symbols I pulled for 2011:

CANCER 23: THE MEETING OF A STUDY GROUP OR LITERARY SOCIETY: This Symbol shows the gathering together of those of like mind in order to exchange or share ideas and information. The search for meaning should always be made in order to enrich not only yourself but those around you. Finding the best way to describe something creates the opportunity for greater access by the collective. Shared higher knowledge. Print media, newspapers, libraries, written word. Critics. Diaries, records and minutes of meetings. Talk back radio.The Caution: Falsifying of ideas. Propaganda spread by media. Intellectual smugness which excludes non-establishment thought. Chatting instead of doing. Being critical.

AQUARIUS 3: A DESERTER FROM THE NAVY STANDS SUDDENLY AWARE OF A DAWNING TRUTH: FREEDOM IS NEVER THE RESULT OF COMPROMISE You may find that the rigorous restraints and rules of the situation are no longer bearable. A decision to opt out may be moral or to maintain free spirit. There are always consequences for not playing the game. Are you prepared for them? Someone could feel they are being taken away from home and family for a reason they don't really understand. Rebellion. Leaving situations although allegiance had been pledged. Wrestling with one's conscience. The Caution: Not being prepared to play by the rules of any socially structured game. Withdrawing support when one should be involved in a physical, mental or emotional way.

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Milk Moon 2009: New Milk Moon

Milk Moon 2010: Forty Two with a Seventy Percent Chance of Rain

This post is about New Years day which I also wrote about in the New Milk Moon post linked to above as well as the January 2010 post New Year!

Solstice Story

Winter Solstice

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 I woke up for the sunrise on Solstice morning and hiked up to the top of Council Crest. The day was grey and I didn't see much of a sunrise, but I did hear a story told by the sky and the trees...

Long, long ago in a time before there was either time or ago, all there was was the Darkness of the Divine. Out of this Darkness the Goddess formed herself and for almost as long as there had been just Darkness there was just the Goddess. Eventually, she came to realize she was alone, and then realized that she was lonely. Out of the one that was The Goddess became the Two, the Goddess and her consort the God. And they were happy.

Out of their happiness and their love sprang the myriad things. Out of their love sprang the stars and the earth, the water and the stones. Out of their love sprang the plants and the grass, the birds of the sky, the fish of the sea and the beasts of their land. Out of their love sprang rain and snow and the light of dawn and the still of twilight. All these myriad things were beautiful and rejoiced in their love of the Goddess and the God. And they were happy.


As time passed the God and the Goddess watched the drama of life play out on Earth. They watched plants grew and deer eat them. They watched deer grow and wolves eat them. They saw the vultures and flies eat the wolves' flesh after they died and the plants grow out of them again. The Goddess and the God watched this cycle, and the countless other cycles of birth and death and rebirth and saw that something else was needed in this world they had created. Just as the mouse sacrificed its life for the life of the snake and the minnow sacrificed for the perch and the fruit for the monkey, something or someone needed to sacrifice their life so that all the life of the myriad things could continue. And they were not happy, but they were at peace.

The God, the Goddess's consort, lover and partner, knew that it was his role to sacrifice himself for his creation. As he grew into the full strength of his power he prepared for his own sacrifice. Finally, despite the Goddess's sorrow, he chose his moment and sacrificed himself in a blaze of color and light. And they were not happy, but they were at peace.

The Goddess mourned his death and plant life seemed to die back in the face of her sorrow. The world grew colder and darker but the God's sacrifice had worked. Like autumn leaves mouldering under the snow to produce the next years light spring soil, his life force permeated all of creation. His sacrifice gave all things a chance at rebirth and renewal. And, miracle of miracles, like the cow elk in the early winter The Goddess found herself pregnant; pregnant with the God himself. And she was happy.

She grew larger in her pregnancy as the world sunk deeper into a winter hibernation. When it felt like the Earth could not be colder or darker, or the Goddess any greater with her child she gave birth. She gave birth to a son, to the God, to light and warmth and growth. She wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and held him close to her as he grew. And they were happy.

The Goddess was so happy with her child, with the birth of light and of summer to come that she wanted to celebrate. In her joy she created humans to help her celebrate, to keep watch over the year as the God is born, grows, becomes strong and fills the world with growing green and warm thing. The Goddess and the humans she created watch and celebrate as The God reaches his full strength, realizes his destiny and sacrifices himself in light and color. The Goddess and the humans she created watch and celebrate even as the Earth sinks into restful dark and cold, renewing and waiting. And again, we celebrate at the birth of the new year's Light. And we are happy.

 
These images are created by AlicePopkorn. Please check out all of her amazingly beautiful and spirit filled work on her flickr stream.

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Winter Solstice 2008: Good Morning Sun! and also Solstice Creche

Winter Solstice 2009: Christmas

The winter 2009 post Advent, Awaiting the Birth and the winter 2010 post The Dark of the Dark are also about Winter Solstice.

The Season of Light Nights

He sat back on his heels, relieved that the small fire finally caught and was burning well. He was tired from the day’s adventure and the thunderstorm in the afternoon had made it hard to find dry tinder. There had been a moment of near panic when the small pile of dry wood collapsed and he had to build it again from scratch but now that he had his fire going he was able to relax.

His mother had looked worried when he set off the previous morning. His grandfather had set the trip up almost against his mother’s wishes. She had said he was too young to go off on his own. Nonsense, Grandfather had replied. He’ll be 17 this fall, plenty old enough to spend a few nights by himself in the forest. The young man and his Grandfather spent many hours that spring in the forest behind their cabin teaching and learning the skills necessary for a trip like this. Grandfather showed him the secrets of finding dry tinder and how to build a fire that will cook food in the evening and then bank the coals so it was easy to start up again in the morning. He learned how to use a bow and arrow to take down rabbits and wood pigeons and then to him to clean and roast them over an open fire. Grandfather also spent many evenings telling stories about wild spirits and forest people that share the land with them. As it got to the height of summer, the season of Light Nights, Grandfather said he was ready. He packed his rucksack, filled his canteen and his mother handed him a bundle of jerky and dried fruit. And off he went. Alone.
That morning had seemed like a holiday. He could do whatever he wanted! Stop whenever he felt like it, take whichever trail called his name. He climbed higher up the mountain, following a bubbling stream through the buzzing, sunlit pine forest. At noon he stopped to pick salmon berries and thimble berries and gorged himself like a little bear cub. As he climbed higher and higher he started singing to himself, then shouting. There was no one to hear and no one to stop him. No one to tell him he was acting like a child, because he was a man now.

The first night had been fine, if a little lonely once it finally got dark. He had not had any trouble finding dry wood or a sheltered place to sleep. As the sky darkened and the stars began to twinkle above he sang the songs that Grandfather had taught him. Songs about heroes of the past who had battled spirits that terrorized their tribe. Songs of Raven and Coyote, the wars between the Mountain Gods and songs that called the Salmon People back each summer. Ancient love songs and work songs and funny songs. He had actually fallen asleep sitting up next to his small fire and had completely forgotten to bank the coals. When he woke up, stiff and cold, he felt a little chagrined at having failed to do such a simple task, but he quickly got a fire started, made some tea and packed up camp.

Today, his second day out, at about noon he topped a ridge that had been a steep climb. He wiped the sweat from his brow and saw a small lake below him. Yipee! He ran down the slope, dumped his rucksack and clothes in a pile near the shore and dove into the water. He relished the feeling of the cool water on his bare skin, how his hair and limbs floated in the water. He opened his eyes under water and watched the fish darting through the grass growing near the shore then floated on his back watching a hawk make lazy circles in the blue sky above. He swam to the far side of the lake and crouched in the bushes watching a mother elk and her calf come to the shore to drink and then get spooked by a family of river otters who chose just that moment to erupt out of their den hole in the bank. He couldn’t help but laugh out loud at the antics of the otters as they tumbled around each other, chased each other across the grass and dove effortlessly under the water.

He really thought life couldn’t get much better than this and spent the rest of the afternoon lazing about on the shore of the lake. He shot a rabbit with his bow and collected wild greens and onions to make into a stew with the meat. He was just ready to eat when the rain started like someone had turned on a faucet. If he’d been paying attention to the signs his Grandfather had shown him he would have had enough warning to clean up his camp and find some place dry to wait out the storm, but he wasn’t. He was able to grab his rucksack and find shelter in some low brush from the worst of the rain, but his fire was put out and his stew pot got knocked over in the wind. What a storm! Theron lay huddled in the bushes, at least wise enough to have stayed out from under the tall pine trees that ringed the lake, and watched the lightning hit the mountain tops across the valley.

When the rain let up he crawled out from under his bushes, cleaned out his cooking pot and kicked apart the soggy, smoking fire. He wasn’t feeling much like singing as he doubled back up the ridge he had come over that morning, heading back towards home. Being alone in the woods, wet and hungry was not nearly as much fun as when it was sunny and warm with a whole day ahead of you. He hiked well into the evening and as the sun was setting found a place to build a small fire.

His spirits were much higher now that his fire was safely burning, but a tinge of the somber mood brought about by the storm was still on him. This night was not a night for singing silly rhyming songs but a night for deep thinking. After making some tea and eating another piece of jerky he found a comfortable spot to sit next to the fire. Why was it so important to Grandfather that he spend this weekend alone? Part of him had been as nervous about it as his mother had been. It was scary to go out all alone. In addition to the bears and cougars that lived in these mountains there was always the chance of falling and breaking a leg, or getting lost or getting sick. Then he felt a flush of pride that he had made it two whole days alone despite all these risks. He hadn’t fallen, he hadn’t met any scary carnivores. He had shot a rabbit, even if he hadn’t gotten to eat more than a taste of it before Brother Thunderstrorm took it away from him. And hadn’t he found a dry spot to build a fire this evening and persevered in making that fire out of the damp tinder? Then a rush of gratitude rushed over him as he sat. He began a spontaneous song of thanksgiving to Brother Rabbit and then to Brother Thunderstorm and Father Sun. To the Mountain itself and to Summer and the Sacred Fire that burned from the wild wood he had gathered. Eventually his song of thanksgiving was directed to Mother Earth and The Great Spirit themselves for all he had and all he was.


As he continued his chanting song of thanksgiving he watched the stars come out in the darkening sky above him. Soon, or maybe it was ages later, felt himself floating through them like the way he had floated through the pond this morning. In his mind's eye he floated, watching the stars and tree tops above him. He felt the trees around him reaching down into the earth and then felt himself sinking down into the soil. But it wasn’t just sinking into the soil, it was sinking into deepness, into expansiveness, into That Which Is. He didn’t know that some people call this the Tao, or God or The Goddess. He didn’t know and he didn’t care, all he knew was that he was no longer a single young man, alone in the forest, but a small part of All.

He could feel the great joy at being Physical, and the great joy of being Spirit. He could feel the joy of worms moving through soil, and of water moving into tree roots. He was in awe of the power that moves water up and the tree trunks and felt the explosive power in plant leaves turning sunlight into sugar. He felt the sweet freedom of movement as an elk walked along the forest floor and the panic as a wolf chased it down. The wolfs pride in its kill was his own as was the satisfaction in feeding its young. He also felt the fear of the rabbits hiding from the owl, the hunger of the baby owls when their mother couldn’t find rabbits and the desperation of fox cubs left alone when their mother had be picked off by a coyote on her way back to the den. He felt the resolute acceptance of the tree falling in a windstorm and the passive watchfulness of a mountain peak.

As his awareness expanded to encompass the whole forest, the whole world, he could even feel the sorrow, the terror, the elation and pride of the humans that walk the earth. He understood that the Spirit he was a part of relished all of these feelings and experiences the physical elements of the earth experienced. The Creator created The Created for just that reason. The realization exploded into his consciousness… we weren’t just a part of the world in a physical sense the way the nitrogen in the soil becomes a part of the leaf of a tree and then the body of a deer. We weren’t just a part of the world in the energetic sense in the way sunlight becomes sugar in a blade of grass and then the energy to make a rabbit run and a snake hunt it down. We were a part of the world in a spiritual sense. We were the same stuff as god, physical manifestations that allow god to experience the energetic world and the physical world.

As the cacophony of the physical world continued to blare into his senses he felt the rising notes of love come out of din. The love mothers feel for their babies, the love between brothers and friends, the love of husbands and wives and lovers of every kind. He felt the love leaders have for their tribes, prophets have for their people and teachers have for their students. His spirit rose with the love people feel for their land and for the other creatures that share that land, and with the love people have for their creative works. The love people have for that which they can not define, for The Great Spirit, The Tao, Nature, God. With this realization the young man felt his heart expand and explode and all he could feel was love and all he could see was white light.

The young man woke up to birdsong and the rays of the morning sun peeking over the ridge across the valley. It was the most beautiful sound he had ever heard and it made him want to see his mother. He quickly packed up camp and quietly set off on the trail back home.